I had THAT dream again.
The dream where I'm either drinking or using an illicit drug.
It's possible that while you are living the sober life -- you too could have a dream of drinking/using.
It can happen -- and it seems to happen to me once or twice per year.
And I have to tell you -- in my case I could not call them dreams.
They are very much nightmares.
Because inevitably I wake up and have some short time coming to terms with what's been in the dream.
And another thing -- since I've been sober my dreams have definitely been more lucid.
Not so much of that type of dreaming where one scene can jump to another unrelated scene but it's still all one dream (surely that's not just me ... is it?)
Firstly -- I'm sure the white-coats and professional counselors have an academic or lecture-hall theory as to why these dreams happen.
I'm not a psychologist, dreamologist or any-other-ologist. So I have no idea.
All I know is that during these dreams -- I see myself either drinking or involved in the hustle of getting and using.
The nightmare part is when -- in the dream -- I'm fully aware of doing something I don't want to be doing.
Oh no!
Those "oh no!" thoughts become a part of the dream.
Worse than that though -- is when I awake and for a few split seconds until I get my waking brain working -- I am unsure if I have in fact busted my sobriety.
Even though it literally takes a few seconds to fully awaken and realize all was but a dream -- it still unnerves me for a short while.
And -- in the wrong frame of mind on that one day -- it COULD (not saying w-o-u-l-d) but it could be enough to throw my entire sober life off tilt and into the dark regions of picking up that first drink again -- or taking that bloody filthy, rotten drug I was addicted to for so many years.
So there it is for today -- dreams and nightmares about old habits.
Be warned. They can happen.
It could be a good idea to discuss this (if you haven't already) with the person who helps you most to stay sober.
Forewarned can be forearmed.
(Image: Google images and galleryhip.com)
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